Pass It Along
by Saja Natalia
Summary: Kaoru begins writing out a story about a very beautiful dojo master and an adorable rurouni, only for the story to be captured by the rest of the Kenshingumi and changed! Hard to explain, but good.


Author's note: So this came to me as I was randomly typing words on my computer (something I do quite a lot, and probably the base for all of the Identity series.) It's kind of weird, and it's not as good as Stereotypes Gone Extreme, I admit, but I like it. So please, read and review. Oh, and please enjoy it!

Saja: I don't own Kenshin, or anything to do with him. cries

Kenshin: No you do _not_! This one is a free spirit! runs off in a rurouni way

Once upon a time there was a redheaded rurouni that decided to stay with a beautiful dojo master with infinitely good cooking skills. It was her alluring way of meeting him that persuaded him to stay by her side, no matter what, always awaiting her kiss. This dojo master was known as The Beautiful Kaoru (I will shorten her name to TBK), and the redhead declared that he would worship her always.

Well, one day, the redhead (who I'll refer to as The Adorable Rurouni or TAR) was walking with TBK when a street urchin tried to steal TAR's wallet. TBK decided this was unacceptable and yelled at the urchin, rose petals falling to float around her.

"I'm so sorry, TBK-ane-sama! I never meant to hurt anyone!" the urchin replied, tears in his eyes. "I will forever be in your debt. How can I pay you back, ane-sama?"

TBK smiled at the boy, her teeth sparkling and making the boy stare in awe. "What is your name?" she asked as TAR looked over her beautiful shoulder. "I must know your name."

Sniff. "My-" Sniffle. "name is-" Sniffle, sniff, sniff. "-I don't know!" he yelled.

"Well then I'll name you," TBK started beautifully, her eyes sparkling. "You will be known as Yahiko-baka from now on."

"Oh thank you ane-sama!"

Yahiko-baka went with TBK and TAR back to the student-filled dojo that TBK owned and began training. Yahiko-baka wasn't too good at this, but TBK was very patient with him even though he couldn't even lift the shinai.

-------

"Busu! What are you doing?" Yahiko yelled, bursting into the room. "I've got to train -- what's that?" he asked as Kaoru attempted to hide what she was writing, but without success.

"Yahiko-baka, ne?" Yahiko asked. "And The Beautiful Kaoru? Oh, _ane-sama_! That's so sickening." Grabbing her brush, he ran from the room and into the kitchen, picking up where she left off.

-------

Yahiko-baka wasn't too good at this, but TBK was very patient with him even though he couldn't even lift the shinai.

However, at that moment, the real Yahiko-sama burst into the room. "What are you doing, Nii-chan?" he asked the weak Yahiko-baka. "You're not me! Now go!"

"I'm sorry, Nii-sama! I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!" he said, bowing and running from the room. Once he was gone, Yahiko-sama turned back to TBK.

"Beautiful? I think not. You shall now be known as Busu no baka. Learn it. Understand it. Accept it," Yahiko-sama told her, and she bowed deeply.

"I-I'm so sorry, Yahiko-sama! I-I didn't mean to be so horrible!" Busu no baka responded, crying. "Please don't hurt me!"

Yahiko-sama gave her a pitying look. "I'll forgive it this once."

"Oh thank you! Doomo arigatoo gozaimashita! I'm forever in your debt!" Busu no baka replied.

"YARRRR!" It was then that they heard a yell. "I AM ZANZA AND I AM HERE TO MOOCH OFF OF YOU AND DEFEAT YAHIKO-SAMA! YARRRRR!"

TAR (now less adorable and less rurouni...ish...well, we'll just call him Kenshin, ok? Sheesh!) popped up behind Yahiko-sama. "NO! Save us, Yahiko-sama! We're all in trouble! Please help! SAVE US FROM THIS THREAT!"

At that moment, Yahiko-sama's lover, Tsubame came running in. "HELP, YAHIKO-SAMA!"

Yahiko-sama marched boldly forward to see the threat, Zanza. The man was dressed in a raggedy shirt and smelled of old cheese. Behind him was a large, wrapped package. "I WILL KEEL YOUUU!" Zanza shouted.

-------

"Hey, Yahiko! What're you up to now?" Sano asked, walking over, sitting down and setting his arm on Yahiko's head. "What's this?" he asked, grabbing the writing and holding it out of Yahiko's reach.

A name caught his attention and he quickly read his description. "You're so dead, kozo!" he yelled, running after Yahiko and chasing him until he eventually gave up.

Sitting on the floor, Sano began to write.

-------

"I WILL KEEL YOUUU!" Zanza shouted. He raised a finger and flicked Tsubame out of the story.

Yahiko-sama's mouth dropped at the gorgeous, clean, good-looking man before him. "I BEG FOR MERCY!" he yelled. "PLEASE! Call me kozo if you must, but I surrender! HERE!" he thrust Kenshin in front of him. "KILL HIM!"

Busu no baka laughed. "Not so powerful now, eh?" She quickly spun in a circle, returning to her TBK status. "C'mon, Kenshin! You can do it!"

Zanza laughed an enchanting laugh that made TBK faint immediately. "You can't beat me!"

The group of people went to watch Kenshin fight Zanza the enchanter and his really, really big zanbato. Zanza decided to play with Kenshin and let him get some hits in before deciding he was bored. "Oh, sorry, Kenshin. You bore me. I'm going to go, but remember this-" Zanza used his really, really big zanbato to whack Kenshin over the head, causing the blade to break.

"Oh well," Zanza said, tossing it aside. "Good bye, Kenshin."

Kenshin watched him go in awe. "I think I've found my role model," he said. Zanza then decided to change his name to the dashing name of Sanosuke, and Kenshin went on to do a whole bunch of unimportant stuff without Sano.

Sano just stayed home with TBK and enjoyed long --

-------

"Oro!" Kenshin exclaimed from behind Sano. "This one is sorry, Sano, but skipping a chance to read this is impossible, that it is. What is this?"

"It's something Yahiko had," he said, handing it to Kenshin who was giving him a very sad rurouni grin. "Now take it before I sock you for giving me that look."

Kenshin smiled and thanked Sano, walking into his room. Sitting down, Kenshin read over what was already written, his reading accompanied by many cries of "Oro!"

Grabbing a spare brush, he began to write his own contribution the paper.

-------

Sano just stayed home with TBK and enjoyed long conversations. They discussed many things while TBK-dono awaited the return of her favorite rurouni eagerly.

The moment Kenshin walked in, TBK-dono flung herself on him, arms around his neck. "I LOVE YOU, ADORABLE RUROUNI!" she would yell. Kenshin just shook his head. "This one is not adorable, although one does love you, too."

TBK-dono fainted.

Then Sano approached Kenshin. "Hey, Kenshin! I need your help! It's an emergency! I'm not joking! Twitch, twitch!" he said. "Honestly! Twitch, twitch!"

Kenshin nodded. "This one will help who ever is in need!"

They wound up in a gambling hall, as Kenshin had suspected. Sano was hopeless and needed Kenshin help to win even a single hand. "Snake eyes, even," Kenshin said once again, not wanting to help Sano any longer. "This is not an emergency."

"Do you know what would have happened if I hadn't gone gambling?" Sano asked, his eyes suddenly red and demonic. "_That_ would have been an emergency!"

-------

"Ken-san!" Megumi yelled from outside of Kenshin's room. "I've heard you have something that I want to see. May I?"

"Yes, Megumi-dono. Come in."

Megumi entered, her face betraying her disappointment when paper was shoved towards her face. "That's it?" she asked quietly before scanning it. Her vixen ears perked up as she grabbed the brush and ink from Kenshin and dashed out of the room.

"Oro!"

-------

"_That _would have been an emergency!"

Just then, a beautiful woman, more beautiful than TBK entered the room, causing all the men to faint, save for Kenshin and Sano. Her eyes found Kenshin's and he melted visibly. "Wh-who are you?" he asked.

"My name is Megumi the Most Majestic and Much More Gorgeous Than Kaoru, but you can call me Much Better Than Kaoru," she crooned, watching as he got up. "Please help me. Please help. I haven't been kissed in so long, I feel as if I've forgotten how to."

"What about me?" Sano asked, standing as well, a sad look on his face. "Can I kiss you, too?"

Kenshin whirled around. "No, you can't! She's this one's! This one saw her first!"

"I'll fight you for her!" Sano challenged, raising his fists.

Kenshin unsheathed his sword (Oh!), his eyes turning golden. "I'll beat you again! I'll beat you for her favor!"

"No! I'll defeat you! Isn't that right, Much Better Than Kaoru? Isn't that right?" Sano asked, coming over and grasping her hand.

"Boys! Boys! Don't worry! You two can share me!" The two boys barely avoided fainting.

-------

"Is the Battosai here?" Megumi looked up from her spot on the porch. Saito stood before her, dressed in his police clothing. "Is he home?" he asked again.

"Yes he is," Megumi said, standing and setting the paper, brush, and ink down. "Let me go fetch him." She turned around and went to get Kenshin, leaving Saito staring at the paper on the porch. Bending over, he picked it up and scrawled a bit at the bottom.

-------

The two boys barely avoided fainting.

Aku. Zoku. San. Everyone dropped to the ground.

Saito stood alone. "You're all fools. And you will all die." Then, using the Gatotsu, he killed off everyone in the story, including Tsubame, even though she had been flicked off of the page.

The end.

-------

"This one is here, Saito. What is needed?" Kenshin asked, looking at the policeman. Koaru stood behind Kenshin, giving Saito a bad look.

"Forget it now, Battosai. I've found enough humor in this," he replied, dropping the paper at Kenshin's feet. Kaoru gasped and scrambled to pick it up and read it.

"Good day."

Author's note: So Kenshin's part is kind of OOC, but oh well. I didn't know what to put for him, and I wasn't sure where to end the fic but I think what turned out isn't _that _bad. Anyway, please review!


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